Episode 045
Identity, Humility, and the Power of the Do-Over with Tony Coyne
He lost the one identity that had defined him forever. Then he lost the job. And then almost lost his marriage.
But this isn't a story about failure. It's about what you do next.
Tony Coyne is a former Yale baseball star turned corporate leader, dad, and accidental life philosopher. He wrote the book The Curveball Life – no connection to this podcast, though it's kind of perfect – to unpack how we bounce back when everything we built our lives on gets stripped away.
In this conversation, Tony talks about navigating brutal setbacks (think: a career-ending injury, a financial tailspin, and a near move that would've wrecked his family), and why most of us are running on old identity scripts that no longer fit.
We also get into: – What not to do when you hit rock bottom – The glass ball vs. rubber ball test for life decisions – Why youth sports culture might be quietly breaking our kids – And what it means to truly let them be little – without dimming their light
If you’ve ever asked “Who am I without the thing I’ve always been good at?” – this one’s for you.
“Your worst moment doesn’t define you. What you do next does.”
Connect witH tony:
- Website: www.thecurveballlife.com
- Instagram: www.instagram.com/thecurveballlife
- Facebook: www.facebook.com/thecurveballlife / www.facebook.com/tony.coyne.22
Timestamps:
00:00 – Meet Tony Coyne: Pro athlete, corporate survivor, and speech therapy kid turned speaker
01:35 – What happens when your identity falls apart
06:30 – From Yale baseball MVP to rookie wake-up call with the Mets
12:42 – “Your worst moment doesn’t define you. What you do next does.”
15:00 – Walking away from a high-prestige, high-pay job at Amazon
21:43 – Rubber ball vs. glass ball: The best life advice from a former boss
29:00 – Why the youth sports industrial complex is doing more harm than good
36:00 – Raising grounded kids in a world that wants them to specialize at age six
44:00 – A love letter to messy midlife pivots, second chances, and sports that still matter